Don’t Let Fear Be Your Decision Maker

So I’m reading a book right now that is fantastic yet horrible at the same time. Let me rephrase that. I’m working through a book right now. Working being the key word. It’s bringing out the raw part of me that I’d like to keep hidden. One of the reasons I’m doing it is to get better at being me, and to get rid of some of my hangups. It’s not easy stuff. I have to observe my actions, thoughts and inner struggles. Writing out my fears and then seeing them differently, through eyes of love – now there’s a concept!

It’s been such an unexpected process so far. I didn’t have a clue, really, what I was getting into. A friend of mine and I decided to go through it together to keep each other accountable and to share our experiences along the way. We’re both open to growth and change and I sometimes think we overdo it. Is that possible? Enough’s enough already! Okay, not really. I don’t think I could ever settle for just getting by or not finding ways to continually enhance who I was created to be.

Forgive yourselfWe so easily beat ourselves up and find ways to feel guilty about so many things. Yes I said ‘find ways’. These past couple of years I’ve become very aware of the trail guilt leaves behind me. Wouldn’t you agree that life is just way too short to allow those negative thought patterns and actions to continue seeping into our brain function and taking up root in there? It’s crucial to nurture our conscience and know within ourselves that we are living authentically; however, there’s also a point of awareness that what we dwell on mentally becomes the life we live. I’d have to say I’m pretty much done with guilt. “Go from me!” as my nephew used to say.

Some of the simplest phrases have already had a profound effect in my own inner thoughts and processes.

  • “I am willing to see this differently.”
  • “I am willing to see love.”
  • “Love did not create this.”

FEAR has been an ongoing theme for me too these past few months. Observing it in action not just in my life but in those around me, it’s apparent that it’s a huge issue to tackle. It seems to drive so much of how we live too. Think about it. We’re told to do so many things ‘just in case’. It seems everywhere I go I’m bombarded with articles or books that talk about it, so I know it’s time to look at how it impacts my world. In his book Start With WhySimon Sinek says:

A powerful manipulator, fear is often used with far less nefarious motivations. We use fear to raise our kids. We use fear to motivate people to obey a code of ethics. Fear is regularly used in public service ads, say to promote child safety or AIDS awareness, or the need to wear seat belts. Anyone who was watching television in the 1980’s got a heavy dose of antidrug advertising, including one often-mimicked public service ad from a federal program to combat drug abuse among teenagers: “This is your brain,” the man’s voice said as he held up a pristine white egg. Then he cracked the egg into a frying pan of spattering hot oil. “This is your brain on drugs…Any questions?”

Fear clings to strange thingsYou know, getting our defenses up and not wanting to acknowledge our shortcomings seems to be rampant. My heart’s desire is to break down those walls in me and to offer thoughts to others on being willing to not just see things differently, but to do them differently.

In all things Life, I’m determined not to let fear (or guilt) be my decision maker. What about you? 

If you want to hear more on the subject of fear, please leave a comment below and I will continue in this vein.


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    "Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do." ~ Jack Kerouac
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